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This has to be one of the funniest all-time stories I have read. While it was bird-hunting rather than rat hunting, Walda Cameron earns a place in the Rat Hunter Hall of Fame for her shooting ... and hypocrisy! Read Walda Cameron's ramblings in Newsweek with excerpts and commentary below.
Walda Cameron - Gun Totin' Liberal Grandma!
In this case, it wasn't a rat, but a bird that would peck on her windows. She tried various techniques to get rid of it, but after several years of it "holding her family hostage" (The Marines are looking for a few good men to defend our freedoms - you need not apply Walda), she "morphed from a cookie-baking granny to a crazed zombie" - you still not need apply!
So she goes to a gun shop and says she'd like to buy a gun to kill a cardinal. The owner replies that it is against the law to shoot a cardinal but she insists it is in self-defense. As she fills out the "mounds of paperwork", she comments "I'll bet you don't get too many liberal women in here buying guns" to which the owner chuckles and replies "You'd be surprised ... A gun is evil only until you need one."
Needless to say, she missed on her first few shots, but finally takes out the cardinal ... ending her family's hostage situation. Hey, who needs a SWAT team when you have Granny Walda around. She then writes how "a wave of relief washed over me ... I felt an urge to beat my breast and howl in triumph. I was a convert, a born-again predator" - Go Granny!
But "then 60-plus years of culture kicked in ... What had I done ...
I left my prey where he had fallen. I stashed the gun in a little-used closet and mourned the demented bird and the parts of me that had died with him. I had lost another comfort zone of self-righteousness ... "
Not surpringly, Walda Cameron got hammered by the animal lovers for shooting the bird, by the anti-gun Liberals for selling out, by pro-gun Conservatives for being such a wimp, and basically everyone else. It was so intense that Newsweeks even had to remove commenting on her article. But HEY Walda, we want to honor your courageous shooting of a bird on Rat-Hunter.Com ... and therefore salute the Gun Totin' (no longer Liberal?) Grandma! ;-)
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